Who Am I and Why Am I Here?

Those are REALLY good questions

Hi, I’m Auntie P! Here’s a quick answer: I was widowed very unexpectedly in 2018 after being happily married my entire adult life. The next long bit is still just a dark blur. Grief is quicksand. Despite the loving support of my amazing son, friends and family, I profoundly missed having a companion and “ride or die”. Late in 2019, I joined a couple dating sites and found myself just gobsmacked by the sheer weirdness of the profiles and messages. Nevertheless, I began having awkward coffee dates with strangers and had even started a promising friendship with a man I dubbed “Bachelor #1″.

The great Covid lockdown struck in March, 2020. I found myself living alone for the first time since I was 24 and unemployed for the first time in my life. I wrote mopey poetry (!) and went through a stage of grief I can only call Obsessive Rummaging. The once-promising friendship sputtered out via text by April. I spent the next seemingly-endless year of isolation messaging bachelors on dating apps and taking eyeball-searing screenshots. I chatted with bots. I dubbed the nicest of the messaging men Bachelors #0, #2, #3, and #4. I received invitations to Hawaii from complete strangers. I got ALL CAPS HOLLERED AT, fallen in love with, and broken up with by men I’d never even met. I got vaccinated and met #4 in the real world. I started a book about the whole surreal experience called Mostly Naked Men, Offering Fish, which also sputtered out.

By 2023, despite all odds, I found I’d been happily dating and adventuring for over 2 years with a lovely man formerly known as Bachelor #4. This blog is my attempt to somehow– if not make sense of it all– at least have an answer to my friends who keep asking about that book I’m supposed to be writing. Okay, critters, here you go!

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